fast day 7

Unfortunately I did not sleep as well as I would have liked last night, despite reading.  I did not have to get up in the night, but I woke up many times with a very dry mouth.  When I got out of bed this morning at 8am, I noticed my throat felt a bit swollen - this lasted most of the day.  Fortunately I did not feel hungry or have an other ill side effects.  I weighed myself and then chugged a lot of water.  Then I took a quick shower, packed up my water and headed downtown to teach most of the day.

My voice was still faint today, but I had a bit more energy when I was teaching - it must have been the adrenaline. In fact I had fantastic chamber music coachings and private lessons with my students, as my mind was still super alert.  Of course I am amazed that I made it through my long day of teaching without passing out!

When I got home I felt drained, so Andy and I took an hour long nap - I think we both really needed it.  Andrew and I talked a bit after we woke up and then he headed upstairs.  And that's when I had another unexpected moment of release. I had a short cry and was overtaken with a feeling of total surrender.  I feel as if I've shed some old layer of skin and that I am starting fresh and anew.

After my little moment, I went upstairs and finished some computer work and drafted this blog post.  Then it was time to cook!  It was so weird to be back in my kitchen, as I have spent no time in it, except to pour myself some water this past week.  And it was so odd to cook without being able to taste the food.  Talk about torture! Nevertheless I had to prepare my meal for tomorrow - a vegetable soup using any veggies except carb-rich vegetables like potatoes.  The veggies had to be cooked for a long period of time, so I thought it would make the most sense to put them in my slow cooker and let them cook overnight - I did not want to have to wait to eat until noon tomorrow. I used my shittake mushroom stock (I am so thankful I had just made a batch the week before) broccoli, carrots, cauliflower, leeks, onion, red cabbage, peas, portobello mushrooms and a few spices and herbs. There was something very satisfying about preparing this soup this evening.  I can't wait to taste it in the morning!

After making the soup, I quickly headed to bed to read, so as not to smell the tempting aromas of my soon to be first meal in seven days. Bedtime this evening, 10:30pm.

I want to take a moment to thank Andy for going to the grocery store to pick up my veggies for my first meal and also for being especially courteous not to eat his meals at home in front of me - he's been super supportive this whole week and words cannot express how grateful I am to have him in my life and how much I love him.  

In terms of other side effects, the hunger pangs did not really set in until around 5pm this evening - then they were pretty relentless.  I think it's the fact that I know I'm going to be eating soon and my body senses this.  I also had more food thoughts this evening, which made this last day a bit more torturous.  Overall, I would say day three and seven of the fast were the most trying.  Luckily I did not feel too chilly today.  Since yesterday I lost another 1lb and 1.6% body fat.

As this fast is drawing to a close, I will say that this whole experience has humbled me and given me a completely different sense of appreciation for my body and an overwhelming sense of gratitude.  I can only hope that I will remain open to what lies before me and continue to stay present in my journey.

"Fasting is important, more important perhaps, than many of us have supposed,... when exercised with a pure heart and a right motive, fasting may provide us with a key to unlock doors where other keys have failed; a window opening up new horizons in the unseen world; a spiritual weapon of God's provision, mighty, to the pulling down of strongholds."

~ Arthur Wallis